Knocking Posters Off The Wall

RED LIGHT. I’m fucking up. Two L’s in one year, but I did this one to myself. I fucked her, just to fuck her. I could have waited for Bubbles. I could have called Jabs, I could have visited China, or drove to Jazz’s house. But NO, I had to go get some new pussy. And new pussy ain’t always good pussy.
I was lost, I couldn’t find this chicks house for shit. She said she lived right next to the Coney Island in an apartment. THERE IS NO DAMN APARTMENT BUILDING NEXT TO THE CONEY ISLAND. Is this chick slow or what? She gives me her address and I’m tripping, shit seems to skip right over hers as I’m driving down the street looking. I tell her to come outside so I can find it quicker. She steps out and ……
Does this girl really stay ABOVE a business? I don’t think yall are hearing me, this is not NEW YORK, where you live above a bodega or something, this is Michigan, where you’re supposed to have a regular house…on the ground!!! This girls apartment was really on top of a store front, which explains why I didn’t see it.
Despite all the location issues, she was looking pretty good. She came down the stairs in some nice booty shorts and white tank top. Something was wrong though, my “R. Kelly” radar was going off. I asked her how old she was and she said 18, but I promise you, she looked 15 in the face and 25 below it. She was around 5’3, brown skin, beautiful teeth, just a tad bit thick, with a nice, cute face. I originally met her RIGHT ACROSS the street at the phone store where I was paying my bill a few weeks ago.
She originally invited me in, but I was hesitant to go in as it felt like a set up. I mean, who really lives above a damn store. I thought her family owned the store or something at first, but nope, they were just regular tenants.
In an effort to kill time, we went up to her apartment. A younger girl stood in the hallway, who I later found out was her sister. Nobody else was home. I quickly asked shortie for her ID and she produced two forms of it. Yep, officially born in 1990. Damn I’m old. So we’re sitting on the couch, not talking about a damn thing. Shortie is either super shy, nervous, or just naturally boring. I’m making small talk, she says she loves Sponge Bob. I’m thinking I need to leave, lol.
Time goes on and we’re just bullshitting, mostly I’m busy texting one of my more mature lady associates and she’s just over there on the couch looking half-retarded. I began to her notice how full her breast were and somehow, my dick started to make me say things, lol. “Those are nice,” I said like a true lame. I refused to be smooth or anything, if she let me hit, so be it, if not, I didn’t come over for that anyway.
After some more bullshit lines, I get her to take her titties out on the couch. Egh, they’re pretty nice. Nice nipples as well. I decide to kiss them. She threw me off because she didn’t have a nice scent. She didn’t smell bad, but she just smelled……normal. No type of perfume, Love Spell, nothing. Even the hoodrats have some scented lotion or something. I decide to go for the nut and get this thing moving so I can go.
I ask her to go to her room. BIG FUCKING MISTAKE.

Lil Bow Wow. Chris Brown. Chris Brown’s little brothers. Sammie. Souljah Boy. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS??
I re-check her id. This girls room is like a damn cut out of “Word Up” magazines. At 18? Seriously. Most girls are done with the posters by 15, 16. I guess she was holding on the dream. I look at her again, making sure I wasn’t loosing my mind, and yea…the girl is cute. I take a pic of her and send it to one of my bisexual lady friends and she confirms it, “yea she’s cute, tell her I said hi.”
Turns out the 18 yr old was bisexual as well, but I already knew I had no future plans on ever seeing this girl again. So now we’re in her room, sitting on the bed. She’s asking slow again, so I crack on her for that might mouth. She says no, but eventually, she lays down on her stomach, facing me as I’m standing up on the floor, near the edge of the bed. I pull my dick out and she puts it in her mouth. Nothing spectacular here to be honest, it was ok at best, just enough to get my dick hard enough for the mag to roll down.
Now I’m in it….this sucks. I’m sure she was thinking the same thing. She was barely wet. I guess that’s what happens sometimes when there is no foreplay. I felt like I had erectile dysfunction or something, cause my dick wouldn’t get all the way hard for shit. It was just……bland. Ahh, but my imagination never fails me. I started to think about one of my ex’s and another girl named “Lady L”….rock hard in 2 seconds. Now I’m stroking her, well I won’t call it stroking, but I’m moving my dick around, lol, and she’s bored and unresponsive. I bend her over so I don’t have to see her face and it still doesn’t work, so I just close my eyes and think about nasty bubbles was the night before. Cool, it worked….until she started moaning. “Shut up,” I told her. She was about to fuck up my nut. Finally, I got that little bullshit nut, threw the condom away and got the heck out of there.
I don’t remember her name, I never gave her one, and I think I told her my name was Mike or something. I took another loss, but this time, it wasn’t the appearance of the girl, it was the appearance of everything she was involved with. Never again will I fuck a girl with posters on her wall.




49 Comments
7/21/2009
keep in contact with her for what? I have a solid base of GOOD women, not to mention random jumpoffs. No need to keep a girl just for pussy, I get that everyday as is.
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7/21/2009
nah not really, in all honesty, I was thinking hey, this would be fun to blog about, lol. Just because it's never happened to me before.
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7/21/2009
lmao!!!!! okay so i love spongebob!! dont talk about my boo like that. i have random spongebob trinkets, but im to grown to go super hard over a cartoon. i also loveeee chris brown && his heavy handed self; [which is fine i love a heavy handed man, just not to my face, lol] but you wont find that nigga plastered on my wall..okay maybe the wall of my laptop after i've put my graphic skills to the test. but geeeze; i know you know better; drake says, "pussy's only pussy, i can get it when i need it" imma need you to have an evaluation&&elimination process you go thru with these girls; cause shes in the way, && even amongst my tattoos, fake eyes, cursewords, && minimal make up….. you already know what time it is… no more disapointments please, stop waisting the kids&& TIME on those unworthy.
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July 21st, 2009 at 6:38 pm
ur very much WORTHY….but ol' boy seems to cuff real hard. I don't want no problems. Plus he look like he run with Street Fam, lol.
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July 21st, 2009 at 9:26 pm
lmao; he says who df is street fam??
annnyway, i already told you bout that. when i got back to school for the semester he wont be thinkin bout cuffin me.lol
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July 21st, 2009 at 10:20 pm
tell him to google Street Fam, "Freck Da Billionaire" in particular. Nigga look just like him. No big deal baby, I'm coming for you, that's my word.
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July 21st, 2009 at 10:32 pm
LLS!!! you are too funny!!!
he does look like him tho; but trust he def isnt anything to be scared of.
mmmkay, bring that ass to va, no motel need **winks** i got my own shit.
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7/21/2009
That is at least the 3rd story I read where you didn't function until you thought of someone else. Why not just leave? Just because she is cute all the other wackness should have made you leave.
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7/21/2009
Wats goin on with u bruh?…..u must really have a bad sex addiction if u keep settling for less like this….I’m disappointed in you
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7/21/2009
"well I won’t call it stroking, but I’m moving my dick around" – LOL !
Also why would you let some one come round your house, and not talk? Just sit there, and let them show their bordem (messing with their phone)…I don't know if I'd call it unsociable, ignorant, or stupid. Or all three.
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7/21/2009
Sometimes I think you just have sex for the sake of having sex, or increasing your numbers.
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July 21st, 2009 at 8:00 pm
but what about all the times I just leave, or hang up, or decline? Oh that's right, I forgot since i don't blog about it, nobody knows it happens. Trust me, it does…..a lot. lol @ get my numbers up, I don't even know how many women I've had sex with. Once it gets past 50, there's no point in counting.
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July 21st, 2009 at 8:04 pm
key word; SOMETIMES. How much do you expect us to know when you tell stories like this? What do YOU expect us to think?
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7/21/2009
first of all that's hilarious second of all seriously i woulda got the hell outta dodge for the posters and the lil sis automatically and if u cant get it up why bother putting it in lmao u was jus being greedy thats crazy !!!! and if u have to check her i.d u might as well leave but u got THAT MAN MENTALITY SUMTHING I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND HONESTLY and obvisously !!!
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7/21/2009
wow…….this is super funny……this is my first time being on here and i have to say its pretty funny so far……but anyways i think you put yourself in some pretty bad situations…….i mean as soon as you seen all those posters you should of ran……..who has posters up on there wall still……….i mean that is super young……and why have sex with her if you couldnt even get it up……..
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7/21/2009
How can you continue to "fuck" a female and she doesn't make a "peep" and then when she does you tell her to "shut up"? That was classic. Leave her alone! Take you a trip to Dallas and cum see what we Dallas women are all about!
This is just the beginning………
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7/21/2009
ok this is hilarious………i wulda left since i found out that she lived on top of a store ………………..no need 4 an id..____i guess she wasnt feelin da dick cuzz she dindnt even moan and when she did u told ha 2 shut uppp ……………………wow im laughin cuzz this is so stupidd______i thought this was goin 2 b sum otha shit when i read da th3m3
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7/22/2009
..im new to this ;; but im true to this ..i log in for my fix on a daily basis .
1st of all ..SHORTY LIVES ON TOP OF A STORE ?? ..PAUSE !!!
2ND ..Lil Bow Wow. Chris Brown. Chris Brown’s little brothers. Sammie. Souljah Boy. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?? — ROTFLMFAO !!..chris brown's little brothers =) ..but back to the issue at hand ..wack pussy ..i feel for you .why start it if you wasnt into it from rip or why invite you over ?!…did she think it was a date…a chill ?! ..PAUSE !! after you were done you should have ripped off one of her posters just because you had to concentrate on something else to get yours ….maybe she would have cried but i will say …your bad ..she did say 18 !!!!.
I LOVE YOUR BLOG ….KEEP IT UP !!!!
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7/22/2009
Hilarious!
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7/22/2009
lol…undresser is funny and picky! no girls with weaves tats or make-up? and he be getting mad ass he makes these stories up! I would like to see his face! and the girl wasnt responive becz ur dick stroke is wack! now comment on my writing style
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July 23rd, 2009 at 6:48 pm
see his face for what??what does that have to do wit the blog in general?
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July 24th, 2009 at 4:32 am
hey krimson how is ur summer going so far? (what in hell does this question have to do with ur question in general)?
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7/22/2009
Well, you are dealing with a young girl she was just 15, 16 2 to 3 years ago…How old are you again? If you can have sex and hold a conversation with a more mature women why didnt's you?? ADMIT IT YOU JUST WANTED TO HAVE SEX WITH HER SO YOU CAN BLOG ABOUT IT!!!
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7/22/2009
ye dude…if u see posters on the wall..and she's TELLING you out of no where that she LOVES spongebob..like that's her way of having a conversation..especially with someone much older lmao then HELLO dude…what more could you have expected to get out of her for real? lol..shit i watch spongebob and other cartoons but i dont think talking about it in a situation like that is a good move at all..it just really kills the mood lmao…but naw you had to have known what you were getting into, you just were hopin the sex would compensate lol
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7/21/2009
Your life is a hot mess. When is it gonna end.. Lol? and i dont care what yall say these girls he deal with have issues u cant be dying for it that bad to where you wanna do a guy that is hoeish. And they all use that same excuse hes real, he smart blah, blah, blah come on women lets wake up we will never get a good dude if we let men do this. my thing is if the undresser was a women she would be getting bashed left and right. hoe, slute, etc even if we were smart and real its the same thing but its ok cause he a guy and has good dick? yall funny! but my man undresser i luv some of the blogs especially the ones that actually have to do with life and relationships rather than how you ended up in keisha in the backseat of your car at a mcdonalds parking lot.. gosh ladies yall so…smh. you the man if you can get these chicks to act like this. your moms would be disapointed
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7/22/2009
Wow lmao @ you tellin` her to shut up when she started moaning.
You should`ve left when you seen the posters.
Lol
That`s horrible you let yourself go thru with that situation
just to get some pussy that you ended up not being able to enjoy
without thinkin` about someone else.
&& yeah you seem picky for someone who's only interested in fuckin`
yes of course you don`t just wanna stick your head in anything
BUT you end up doing it anyway.
. . . .
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7/22/2009
when you fuck over your fa sho pussy, tryna get some mo pussy, you'll end up with no pussy.
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7/22/2009
Man I feel bad for this girl. At 18 she probably doesn’t have much life experience and I feel as though she was taken advantage of in this situation. Sure she put herself out there to be used, but I think you should have taken those posters on the wall and her lack of conversational skills as a sign of immaturity and kept it moving.
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7/22/2009
Okay I have a question; if you are having intercourse with a woman and you are thinking of some other woman or women and when the woman you are having sex with makes a sound you tell her to shut up, isn't that masturbation?
Lol
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July 22nd, 2009 at 10:30 pm
naw yo u just making shit complicated now..if a penis is in a vagina, it's sex..point blank period..sexual intercourse to be exact…masturbation is a solo act…ppl can watch but once they start doin shit to u, it's not masturbation no more…one's mental doesnt make a difference
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July 22nd, 2009 at 11:41 pm
"Okay I have a question; if you are HAVING INTERCOURSE WITH A WOMAN…."
If you're with someone, it's not masturbation.
But thank you for giving me my morning laughs!
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7/22/2009
Lol thanks.
&& Ohkay I get it., I get it.
Basically you`re not picky when it comes to pussy.
You`re picky only to who gets to get on your A – Team
Am I right.?
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July 22nd, 2009 at 11:32 pm
I just take it as it goes. It's not like I"m looking for A-Team women, if they come, that's fine. I blogged about the ATeam before though.
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July 24th, 2009 at 5:18 am
well i figured that. . .
but wow yur stories are . . . interestin`.
makes me wonder if they`reREAL or not
lol
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July 24th, 2009 at 9:17 pm
if I made this stuff up, I'd post everyday with a different sex story. If you really don't believe me, I'll call the girl on 3way. Oh wait, I don't even have her number anymore. Ah well. All you gotta do is go next to the coney island and wait for a black girl to come out, she's the only black person in the neighborhood, lol.
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7/22/2009
you can't be serious, lol
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7/23/2009
Y do you go for new pussy anyways? You got a team of freaks so y not stick to someone thats worth your time? I guess good dick is more hard to come by then good pussy b/c when I find something good i lock it down.
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July 23rd, 2009 at 1:05 pm
I wasn't going for new pussy, I was just around her and my dick got hard. Furthermore, I don't have a team of anything. Sorry I don't update the "roster", but women stop talking to me, and vice versa, everyday. I see them when I see them.
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7/22/2009
I hear you Jazz but, I dont care how good the d*ck is im not locking down nothing that ALOT of other people had that is nasty and i dont see how these people dont see that, but if you have girls that you rather be around why bother with jumps? anywho have yall notice that he never talks about his main i wonder why it would be interesting to hear from hes a team obsessed most of the blogs ive seen are about them.
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7/23/2009
This is crazy….
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7/23/2009
iight, this is plain stupid, after you saw her crib and little sister u shoulda been out. no kind of attraction leads to bad sex
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7/25/2009
R u serious Abstract? I don't know the guy that created this blog but based on what I've read, he can be picky. He can dismiss this chick and still have plenty options. You make yourself look desperate Abstract.
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7/25/2009
following up on what the others said… keeping in touch with her isnt even worth the hassle, just as much as it is about "getting ass" you still have to deal with her prior to and after the act that WILL make it unbearable and when you have better why deal
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7/25/2009
i notice its a lot of females commenting on this and yall have to realize guys look at sex TOTALLY different, once we get to the point where there is an erection many times we do what we have to in order to find that release (that mess is PAINFUL) so im welling to bet as much as he didnt want to deal with her, he didnt wanna deal with having that erection more so he took the L
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7/26/2009
Okay, lol, I stumbled on your blog yesterday and I have to say LMAO and WOW to a lot of the things that you do. With this one, as soon as I saw the little sister I woulda backed away from that quick…
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7/27/2009
From my experiences chicks that live above store fronts are always a tad loose with the vikki's. I wouldn't call it an L, but its not a dub either. Call it a draw and in the future ask a chick what kind of music they listen to. That way you make sure not smashing any teenie boppers.
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7/31/2009
funny picture you holding your head..disappointed in you
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1/30/2010
when u said lady L did u mean the women from twerk team ?
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January 30th, 2010 at 4:50 pm
not at all.
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