They Don’t Have Gas, But You Don’t Have A Car
I am not a yes man, I can’t be. I think there is a strand in my dna that forces me to question anything that I hear and/or read, no matter what the source is. I genuinely adore women with very high self-esteem, however, I cannot stomach people who put others down to put themselves up, especially when they are as wrong as the sugar dude on Housewives of Atlanta in the first place. This particular young lady happens to be a friend of a another young lady that I tried to have sex with months ago (and I failed), which resulted in me casually adding her and a dozen other women that day under the suggested friends link. During my daily run down through the statuses on my facebook wall, I came across the following (WARNING: You might have to speak hoodrat to read it correctly)…
DNT UNDERSTAND PPL WIT CARS WHO CLAIM DEY AINT NVA GOT NO GAS..LYK WATS DA POINT OF HVN A CAR IF U NVA GT GAS GO SALE YO SHYT..!! UGH SHYT IRRITATES ME YET ANUTHA NYT N YALL MOFOS WANA ACT FUNNY WEN I ASK4ARAIDE2WRK…FUKN IDIOTZ!!KILL YASELF N NPOUND YA CARS #BROKE MOFOS
In Michigan, most people who can afford to have and maintain a vehicle, do so. It’s not like New York, Chicago, and other major cities where a lot of people opt to use public transportation to get around. Besides, the crime rate on Southeaster Michigan buses is high enough as it.
I’ve had 6 or 7 cars in my life and I’ve found myself with a my gas tank on E more than once. I also know that in my earlier years, when someone calls me to take them somewhere or pick them up, I responded with the best basic lie in the world, “I don’t have any gas.” If this girl simply needed a ride to work and she has money, as this status would lead you to believe, wouldn’t her answer to someone who doesn’t have any gas be to simply offer them gas money? Perhaps she did and the person said they didn’t have enough gas to get to them, which is also possible.
Another young fellow (who used to be my boy until he started kissing on my ex, lol) also looked at her status a little funny as anyone with common sense would. He responded:
“[How] they broke if they dont wanna take u or offer gas money”
Her response:
THEY BROKE KUZ CLEARLY DEY AINT GOT NO GAS N DEY CAR I GUESS U DDNT READ MY STAT KUS DASS WAT I JUS SAID
She often makes statuses referring to all the men who love her and are on her “dick,” yet she seemed to have a problem getting somewhere. I think you should rethink your bragging rights if you can’t call one of your groopies to take you to work. There are about 53 women in my database at the moment and I’ll be darned if I couldn’t call atleast 10 to come get me for an emergency, but then again, I don’t confuse having someone that may want to fuck me on their time to someone who actually gives a f*ck about me.
Now it’s my turn. Keep in mind the tone I keep throughout these replies. I’m as cool as Mike Tomlin:
Some people always have the little money they do have because they dont have cas. They have gas, they just don’t [have] gas to see you.
she responded:
Dass da brokest shyt ii eva heard btvii aint tripn kuz im gtn my charger,magnum,grand prix, or jeep liberty nxt month so whateva
Ok, it’s 2011, you can get a 2006 Dodge Charger 2.7 SE for $7,000 from a used car lot…that’s not exactly ballin’. I’ve personally owned two of those cars, so I’m not knocking them, but the way she was talking, I expected to see “gtn my CTS-V Coupe, 2011 Range Rover Sport, CL 500 nxt month.”
like you said before…they could be lying because they don’t want to take you anywhere, in which case, they should say no.
exactly..but SHYT IDC CUX IM STL GOIN TO WRK GTN.MO BREAD DEM DEN
Darn it, now she struck a nerve…
you telling someone how much “bread” you are getting…when you’re asking other people for a ride (I think that’s what’s happening here)…doesn’t sound right.
Now let me clarify this, I don’t mean you can’t have money and not have transportation that day, because you can. I’ve had a few grand in my pocket with no car, but what I didn’t do is go talking negatively about anyone that did have a car while I was walking my ass down the street. They could have had a damn 94 Dodge Neon with just enough gas to get back to work the next day; anything is better than having to beg people to take you somewhere. Also, if I was fortunate enough to have some money in my pocket, I’d gladly offer anyone who was willing to take me somewhere gas money as well as something extra for taking time out to help me. Apparently, my response and the two responses to my response, also struck her extreme rat button, uh oh, all CAPS again:
BKUZ NIGGA IM SAVING TO BUY MY FUKN CAR YBUBOVA DERE DICK RIDN Y DONT U STFU N GTFO MY PG U ALL OVA HERE N MY POCKETS
she wasn’t done either, ouch:
CANT STAND NOSEY ASS MOFOS COMMENTN ON MI SHYT N DNT EVEN KNW WTF DEY TLKN.BOUT BT B DA MAIN.ONES FICK SUKN ON MI PG..COMMENTN ON ALL MY.PIX GET YO THIRSTY ASS outa here …N LIKE I FUKN SAID IM SAVIN TO CASH OUT ON MI FUKN CAR IF I WANTED… A RAGGEDY SHIN DIG PROB WAT U GOT I KUDA BN GT DAT BUT IM GOIN HIGHER FOR WAT I WANT BT UR A NOBDY SO I DNT HV TO XPLAIN SHYT TO YO DICK SUKIN ASS..
N ICEBERG U ALL ON.HIS TEAM AINT YU..U CAN DELETE YOSELF TO
lmao. She went HAM on me right. You know what’s funny to me, people that post stuff on facebook then call someone else nosey for responding to it. I didn’t go digging through your statuses genius, it popped up. Now why is it she cursed me out and called me a homosexual? Ah well, here’s what I said:
It’s kind of hard to understand your responses since they are not in standard American English, but I wasn’t trying to diss you.
You’re calling someone broke when they have something you don’t even have. You just sound mad because they’re not doing what you want them to do. Please do not make yourself seem more ignorant by saying I’m thirsty for you. Trust me, I would never chase after you. You are sexy, so I commented on your pics. I never tried to approach you in any sort of romantic or sexual way.
I don’t care about your money, I hope you have a whole lot of it. I hope you get 40 cars so you can feel good about yourself. Love yourself.
Everybody on my friends list who has paid attention knows I comment on everyone’s pics. Even if I don’t like them, I say something nice whenever I can. I don’t know how that means I’m thirsty. I’ve never sent this woman a note, tried to get her number, or anything of the sort. I think she’s a stripper (not sure) and I stopped pursuing her girl because I found out my boy already fucked her. If you ever find out that I was consistently trying to gain the attention of any woman that types like this, I will give you a stack and jump off a bridge.
As usual, I don’t feel I did anything wrong and the blame was entirely on her, but I’d like to hear what other people think.
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Author: The Undresser
Black, Single, and Not Looking. Enjoys grilled salmon, cold glasses of water, and grocery shopping at Meijer. Likes women with nice ass to waist ratios, Reese Cups, and watching Real Time with Bill Maher. Dislikes cigarettes, littering, and disobedient children.
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36 Comments
1/25/2011
All I can is I agree with you and I laughed mainly at her typing. IT was horrendous but tahnkfully I have seen enough of it on MySpace and Facebook to be a bit fluent in hoodratish. You were not wrong at all. I have a car BUT what I dont have is money to play taxi and since I am a frequent drinker I usually turn down taxi money in favor of going somewhere so I can get drunk that is close to my home. Whomever decides to ride with me knows they are now on my time and they may be spending the night at my house and not going home till the afternoon the next day.
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January 25th, 2011 at 4:01 pm
lol @ your name.
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1/25/2011
A bitch that types —-LYIIIKE DIS—-gets on my mf nerves & can’t be any older than 20.
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January 25th, 2011 at 3:56 pm
she’s older than 20.
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January 26th, 2011 at 8:30 pm
u know i really wanna find this chick on facebook so i can direct her to the hooked on phonics website.
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January 26th, 2011 at 9:01 pm
she’s getting bread, maybe this is just an act.
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1/25/2011
You always want to tell someone how they are wrong. How about you don’t comment if you don’t like the status. That’s what you always preach to everyone else.
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January 25th, 2011 at 4:02 pm
ha, I knew you missed my dick, how does it feel to be back on it?
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January 26th, 2011 at 8:50 pm
*dead*
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1/25/2011
Reading her stat/responses made my head hurt. How did you even understand what she wrote??I totally agree when you say this is her fault and you did nothing wrong. Any person with half a brain could see that you were just stating your opinion, not speaking negative to or about her. She could be a poster girl for EXTREME RATCHEDNESS!!
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January 28th, 2011 at 1:26 am
I completely agree. Reading what she typed made me feel like I just lost a couple IQ points.
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1/25/2011
Lol @thebest. Why don’t you follow your own advice. I personally couldn’t understand what the chick was saying. I’m sorry I don’t speak hoodrat. You should have had a translation for those who are fluent. But its obvious that she was offended because you struck a nerve. I was always told if a person get defense off of what you say it must be true.
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1/25/2011
smh…this brand of hoodrat cant be reasoned with or convinced with logical explanations. Bottom line: You can’t call someone else broke, when you’re the one that needs the ride.
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January 25th, 2011 at 11:25 pm
LMAO *dead*
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1/25/2011
smh…this brand of hoodrat cant be reasoned with or convinced with logical explanations. Bottom line: You can’t call someone else broke, when you’re the one that needs the ride.
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1/25/2011
LMAO I hardly know where to begin. She is a joke… like Tiny & Toya but in sunday morning comic form. Why exactly is it that the most ignorant among us have the loudest voice? Perhaps for that reason—> they’re ignorant of their own stupidity. I dont know what’s worse, her horrific bastardization of the english language, her infantile response to what began as civil discourse, OR ridiculous rationalization of a FOOLISH opinion.
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January 25th, 2011 at 10:43 pm
damn I like the way you worded that. I need to have sex now, lol.
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1/25/2011
I think you were 100% right. Did you get a headache from reading what she was saying? Because I did, I can’t read that much “hoodrat” at once.
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January 26th, 2011 at 12:39 am
some of the sentence fragments required several re-reads to comprehend, but eventually I got it. I was still trying to figure out why she decided to curse me out out of nowhere.
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1/25/2011
I’m seriously mad you even tried to attempt a logical conversation with a illogical person. I mean anyone who types like that, plus older than twenty, plus in all capital letters, typing like she is actually yelling at you is immature, and not worth the risk of carpal tunnel; however, it was extremely entertaining, and that was the whole point to me.
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January 26th, 2011 at 12:39 am
lol @ carpal tunnel.
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1/26/2011
I wanna slap the shit out of her by just looking at the way she types. OMFG
I dont even know why you wasted you time, UH. Her brain is obviously not functioning properly *shrugs*
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January 26th, 2011 at 3:26 am
violence is not the answer, lol.
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1/26/2011
Gracious…I tried reading the status update you posted, I was successful yet in pain from the frustration of deciphering that mess…I tried to read more but I just cannot, I don’t own a hoodrat decoder ring and don’t speak it fluently. Anywho shorty is a bird as is obvious by her rational behind why she wasn’t wrong and her immediate choice of vehicle. Perfect example of the public school system (not to mention the black family) failing another. Shame really
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January 26th, 2011 at 8:55 am
hey, hey, I attended Detroit Public Schools and while I’m not a scholar, I can form basic sentences.
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January 26th, 2011 at 2:56 pm
word i hate when people blame the public schools lol. it don’t take a GREAT school to teach one how to read or form a coherent sentence. sheesh, even a run on sentence with ANY form of punctuation or vowels would be an upgrade for this chick. there are 2 year olds on infomercials with better English skills for her. they oughta create a colony called “GucciVille”, let Gucci Mane be the president and send all the hoodrats of all races and creeds there. the world would be a better place lol. kidding..sort of.
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January 26th, 2011 at 2:58 pm
oh yeah *doesnt & *than (rather than for). lol.
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1/26/2011
How in the fuck can you read that shit? I am all for slang but I would hate to hear her in a real conversation cause she writes just like she talks.
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January 26th, 2011 at 8:55 am
now that’s something we can agree on. If she does talk like she writes, I couldn’t take it either.
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1/26/2011
OMG! You cannot be serious! I had to reread a sentence like 4 times… My head hurt. What a lame.
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January 26th, 2011 at 8:56 am
lmao. yall are crazy.
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1/27/2011
oh man. I absolutely hate people who text/post/email something that I have to read 4 or 5 times to fully understand. With that being said, her state of mind is all too common especially in the DMV. I just had to curse out my own cousin about “asking for a ride” etiquette. She asked to go out with me, offered no gas money, had no money to get into the nightclub ($5 entry fee), no money to buy drinks, and then had the audacity to tell me when she was ready to go…HUH?! She even went on to tell me how I was inconsiderate. Silly broads, I swear!
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2/2/2011
i really couldn’t understand what she was trying to say because i don’t speak pigeon. but what from i could gather you’re right. she’s just mad that people don’t want to do what she wants them to do. people who think the world revolves around them bother me.
on another note, this is why i can’t stand facebook or any social media site. although i am on facebook and twitter. people always claim someone is stalking them or in their business. umm if you didn’t put your whole life out there then people wouldn’t have things to stalk. secretly i think people like her crave the attention. then they’ll go tell their friends about all the “haters” they have.
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2/3/2011
Seriously, my eyes hurt from reading her status… and I feel what ya saying, I use to give people rides everytime they need one.. when I started to get low on the funds, and told people that I needed gas money if they wanted a ride, they got piss at me, believing since we were friends that I didn’t have the right to ask them… GTFO…
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February 4th, 2011 at 5:28 am
if I don’t have any gas, then I can’t help you….or myself.
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+1
shishitokyo88 Reply:
February 4th, 2011 at 9:53 pm
RIGHT
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