Top 5 Ways To Be A Courteous Cheater
5. Keep Your Dick Clean
So you just finished banging out your side piece and you’re headed over your main girl’s house to spend some quality time with her; not so fast. Before you meet up with her, take a shower. Just washing off your dick might seem like an acceptable solution, but any woman with common sense will wonder why your dick and balls smell like fresh soap, but the rest of you doesn’t.
4. Feed Your Boo
If you’re decided to go out on a date with one of your backup lady friends, be considerate to your main squeeze. If your jumpoff gets to eat, then so does your boo, so pack up those leftovers and serve her in bed.
3. Fresh Kisses
If you dare to give one of your mistresses oral sex, make sure you brush your teeth, floss, and use mouth wash atleast twice before kissing your girlfriend again. In addition, it is common courtesy to wait atleast 24 hours. If she tries to kiss you first, give her a nice kiss on the cheek instead.
2. Sharing Is Caring
Nobody likes a stingy pimp. If you have hoes on the side cashing you out, be sure to share some of that money with your wifey. If your young chick works at Macy’s, use her discount to pick up your girl something nice. If your old lonely chick gives you $300 to buy some new shoes, spend $250 on yourself and pick up your girl some heels from Bakers.
1. Make sure she comes first
Not even the most understanding woman wants to think that you’re giving some other hussy more attention than her. Invest in a time chart in which you can keep up with the women you’ve seen and how long you’ve seen them. Next time she says, “I don’t get the most amount of your time anymore,” you can print out the chart from Week 10 and confirm that she officially received 12.3 hours and number two only got 6.3 hours.
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Author: The Undresser
Black, Single, and Not Looking. Enjoys grilled salmon, cold glasses of water, and grocery shopping at Meijer. Likes women with nice ass to waist ratios, Reese Cups, and watching Real Time with Bill Maher. Dislikes cigarettes, littering, and disobedient children.
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13 Comments
1/3/2011
Yaay!! New post was entertaining!!! how bout not cheat at all?! jus a thought!! but then again almost even cheats in some type of way!
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1/3/2011
Yaay!! New post was entertaining!!! how bout no cheating at all?! jus a thought!! but then again almost everyone cheats in some type of way!
last comment was messed up from typing too fast!
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January 16th, 2011 at 1:33 am
Yea, @beautifulbeee08, i’m with you, this is ridiculous but ppl are going to do what they want regardless. Just takes too much time && effort for me, but hey, what do I know..
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1/3/2011
Damn about time for a new post huh?
Happy New Year!!
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January 3rd, 2011 at 1:02 pm
Exactly. Oh don’t worry, there will be atleast 4-5 blogs this week. I’ve already written three of them, so they’re on auto post. Some are stupid, some are short, some are long, thought out rants. I just renewed my domain, so I’ll feel like I wasted $6.38 this year if I don’t atleast write a few blogs.
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1/3/2011
SMDH UH!!! Some ppl will never learn, i guess. LOL
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1/3/2011
*smh* I hate you a little for this. You’re a fool. How do I continue to love you?
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1/3/2011
Well Happy New Year…Great way to let these cheaters know how to cheat better.
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1/3/2011
Courteous cheater? That made me laugh! But I like your ideas. Nice tips to be a cheater
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1/3/2011
“Fresh Kiss” I think that is the key. Girls will fall for a fresh kiss anytime/all the time.
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1/3/2011
SMGDH….if you have to put that much thought into cheating, then you know it’s going to hurt her and you shouldn’t be doing it! And btw…if my “man” ever came home smelling like fresh irish spring…it’s going to be some problems…I’d be like “shower when you get yo’ ass home next time.”
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1/6/2011
Hilarious good tips lol
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1/10/2011
Im LMAO! Too funny.
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