Where Is Your Girlfriend? The Return Of Jersey
Remember when you met the woman that you’re with today? You paraded around with her at restaurants and clubs with such procession. You called her everyday, professing your devotion to making her happy. You held her hand, told her you loved her, and made time for her. You didn’t stop until she became multi-orgasmic; you made love to her AND you fucked the shit out of her. Well, this is what happens when you stop doing all of that; you’re girlfriend becomes a blog entry. A REALLY GOOD FUCKING BLOG ENTRY…
She’s the last woman I expected to receive a late-night call from. The last time we crossed paths was back in June at Macy’s and she smacked my hand firmly when I tried to cuff her lady lumps. I didn’t recognize the name on my caller id, but after a second glance, I remembered the last name very faintly. I called the number back and was stunned when I heard, “Hey, this is Jersey.”
“Where are you?” she asked. That question usually means one thing, SEX. Then again, she could have been stranded somewhere and we have enough history that I would have gotten up to pick her up without a fuss. As I expected though, she wanted some d**k. Apparently, her and her man were on “break” because he wasn’t treating her right. In her mind, withholding sex would get him to do the right thing, which is by far the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard in my life. All you’re going to get from a dude who you are keeping sex from, is a man who is willing to say and temporarily do whatever it is to get that box open again. As I pressed her for answers, she began to tell me that he wasn’t taking her out anymore. He wasn’t do the things that he did 3 or 4 months ago that kept her faithful to him. In turn, they haven’t had sex in a few weeks.
Am I special? HECKS NO. She told me she hasn’t had sex with anyone else but him, but after I gave her the bullshit face, she admitted that she “kinda” had sex with a dude last week. The dude supposedly couldn’t maintain an erection, so she chooses to not count that in her sexual history. Unfortunately for him, he didn’t just miss out on her, but her bisexual female friend that she brought along. Ah well.
After trying to play relationship guru, I came to the conclusion that she was horny and wanted me to help her scratch that itch. What type of friend would I be if I couldn’t help out a friend in her time of need? Not a very good one, that’s what kind. So I gave her the address…GREEN LIGHT.
She hopped out of her car just as thick as I remember. Heels on, thighs and ass poking out of her jeans. At this point, I’m not even sure I’ll be able to give her what she desires. There wasn’t anything sexual on my mind at all. I was honestly still trying to find out what the heck makes a woman step outside of such a good relationship. Besides, she lives with this man, and he’s at home while she’s standing outside with me.
When we got to the spot, we hopped in the back and she waited for me to sit back before hearing her say, “those bitches you fuck with can’t suck dick like me.” Even though that’s not entirely true, cause damn I know some girls that can suck the yellow off…anyway, she did her thing. The sloppy way, just like I like it.
After she was satisfied with my erection, she pulled off her pants and pulled out a vibrator from her purse. She turned up the power and laid down on the back seat while massaging her clitoris, inviting me in. I rolled down the condom and slid into her box. As I stroked her, she talked the type shit (sorry she wouldn’t let me record her) that would belongs in a hardcore porno flick. “Gimme that big ass dick…fuck the shit out of me…damn I love your dick daddy,” she continued on. I pulled out and noticed all of the cream she released only 3 minutes in. Her p***y was warm, good, and wet. My unceasing strokes worked in unison with her vibrator to release all of sexual frustration. “Move that shit,” I demanded. She cut it off and threw it to the side. “Open those fucking legs up,” I said as she put her legs up. I grabbed her neck and fucked her…the right way. I guided my dick against her vaginal tissues on some sex therapy shit. I was in control.
But, as usual, she started to act a fucking nut. “Fuck this fucking pussy,” she cried out. She moaned, screamed, and said some of the nastiest combination of words I’ve heard in a while. My brain couldn’t stop from sending the signal that it was time to bust. Then it was over. I looked at her as she laughed, “you fucked up my nut,” I complained. I could have fucked her for an hour if she would have just shut up, but she had to take it to that next level. She was good though…satisfied.
She pulled out her toy and went at it again while we watched the naked bodies of strippers in Camron’s “Suck It Or Not” video.
I probably won’t ever see her again, but I will offer this advice to you dudes out there who have freaky ass girlfriends who call themselves not giving it up. GO GET IT. A real freak can only fight you off for so long. When Bubbles used to get mad at me, I’d throw her ass on the bed and rip her panties off. When she felt my erection against her thighs, she gave in. When Bumble Bee tried to fight me off, I’d kiss down her belly and let her know that I NEEDED to taste her nectar…she gave in.
Don’t let your girl run onto the dick of a dude like me because you’re too scared be aggressive.
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Author: The Undresser
Black, Single, and Not Looking. Enjoys grilled salmon, cold glasses of water, and grocery shopping at Meijer. Likes women with nice ass to waist ratios, Reese Cups, and watching Real Time with Bill Maher. Dislikes cigarettes, littering, and disobedient children.
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32 Comments
10/11/2010
“I will offer this advice to you dudes out there who have freaky ass girlfriends who call themselves not giving it up. GO GET IT. A real freak can only fight you off for so long.”
A-freaking-MEN!!!! No need to comment, that sentence satisfied me enough to the point i dont even wanna say anything. LMAO
Btw, love the new look
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October 11th, 2010 at 10:33 am
thanks miss.
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October 11th, 2010 at 11:38 am
No prob
Can we work on this thingie saving the names and e-mails tho?
Cause i have to enter all’a'that everytime i comment
Kthanks!
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October 11th, 2010 at 11:50 am
I don’t think that has anything to do with the theme. You could always just login.
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+1
AGK Reply:
October 11th, 2010 at 3:27 pm
Awe, i was thinking it did, cause the previous one had the info saved… Oh well, i’ll survive
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October 17th, 2010 at 12:34 am
I agree! thats all you need to do!!
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10/11/2010
SMH..He brought this on himself.. Love the post!! *clapping!!*
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October 11th, 2010 at 10:36 am
That’s not a reason to cheat though, well not a good one. We’re cool and all, but like I told her yesterday, there is a lot of deceitful and shit going on in her relationship. He still doesn’t know that she has sex with other women, let alone know that she’s had sex with some other dude along with myself. How are you supposed to have a “good” relationship with all those secrets and lies going on?
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10/11/2010
1. I like the old look better. We’re really gonna have to talk about these blog designs, Mister.
2. When I seen the title, I thought it was about something else with females asking “where yo boys”.
3. GET IT GIRL@VIBE but lol@you messing up her nut cause she was talking stuff. Gotta love it.
4. I NEED YOU!
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October 11th, 2010 at 11:51 am
I didn’t mess up HER nut, I messed up my own.
@ #4…umm, need me to do what? I told you I’d put that desk together. I thought you already had someone else do it.
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October 11th, 2010 at 12:05 pm
I meant her nut. I must need to go back to sleep. That desk was so long ago and I did it myself. Yay Me! Yet I have something else that needs fixing.
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October 11th, 2010 at 12:08 pm
funny. You read this and say you need me. I read the fact that you saw me and 20 other niggas over the weekend including “all of your ex’s”, and I was disgusted.
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October 11th, 2010 at 12:08 pm
DARNIT. I meant YOUR nut. Okay, YES, I’m going back to sleep for another half hour. Lack of at least a nap the last 96 hours seems to mess with my brain right now.
PS. UGH@this blog design.
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October 11th, 2010 at 3:15 pm
lmao @ your gravatar. That’s my FAVORITE pic.
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October 11th, 2010 at 5:29 pm
So Silly. Thankx!
10/11/2010
Jersey honestly don’t like fuckin her boyfriend. His sex is weak. She likes him as a person but whn yo man dick gsme is on point, u dnt think about cheating. U only cheat whn he not freaky enough, he come too quick but can’t get it back up, or he’s n it for him and please u rite. She called u bc she knew u could give her wht she needed and she could be herself with u. Fuck the time n going out his dick game ain’t for her lol
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October 11th, 2010 at 3:15 pm
I don’t think that’s true. Jersey is usually 100 with me. I’d like to hear her response this though.
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October 11th, 2010 at 5:33 pm
U will be surprised wht dick will do. If she hasn’t told him she like girls, he ain’t fuckin her rite. She has to hold make whn she fuckin him. He probably dnt put his finger n her ass whn he fuck or eat pussy rite. Yea jersey maybe a little upset about them not doing the things they use to do but his sex game has a big thing to do with it too. Whn u gettin dicked dwn, I nigga can do so much more shit without u gettin really upset. Whn a nigga got dick game u try to do things to piss him off up fuckin another nigga is like the last option bc u knw the one u cheatin with can’t fuck with yo man.
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October 11th, 2010 at 5:57 pm
in that case, why hasn’t your girl told her dude that she likes girls? For some women, it’s not about not telling cause they are not satisfied (atleast as it was explained to me), it’s about the dude that they like and/or love not thinking that girls with girls is attractive or sexy. I don’t even know where you come up with this stuff, lol.
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10/11/2010
Gotta admit, the call from the chick that left you for someone else, asking for a does of medicine, is one of the BEST calls a man can get. Well done.
Oh, and the next theme is all good. i don’t really care about the theme as long as the content is on point. ha! as for feedback, i would prefer having the original commenters gravatar on top, next to their comment, instead of at the bottom. hard to tell who the original commenter is without scrolling down. but like i said, all the info is there so who am i to complain!?
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October 11th, 2010 at 3:16 pm
yea I don’t like that either. I have to work on it later because my other websites needed an overhaul as well. Took me long enough to get this one online.
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October 11th, 2010 at 3:30 pm
Forgive me for interrupting (lol), but i keep reading bout “the other websites”… Can we get some names? Pleeease?
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October 11th, 2010 at 5:33 pm
Agree@call from the past one. Along with the slight confusion.
Gonna have to design something and send it to him because this is killing me eyes.
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10/11/2010
( But, as usual, she started to act a fucking nut. “f**k this fucking p***y,” she cried out. She moaned, screamed, and said some of the nastiest combination of words I’ve heard in a while. My brain couldn’t stop from sending the signal that it was time to bust. Then it was over. I looked at her as she laughed, “you f****d up my nut,” )
That’ll keep me laughin’ all day!!!! Hahahahahaha!!!! Good post!!!
@BubbleBee… Girl I’m like your number 1 fan! Hahaha ur so funny I love when you comment on here!
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October 11th, 2010 at 5:46 pm
Add that good ol’ Z after the D.
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October 11th, 2010 at 5:59 pm
get off her clit, lol.
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October 11th, 2010 at 6:08 pm
Trust I’m not on it. lol. She’s funny.
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October 14th, 2010 at 12:50 am
THANX @ LuvinDaReadz! I appreciate the love hun! HUGS. Undresser, stop hating!
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10/13/2010
Good gracious @ BB’s gravatar lol. I’m with the commenter whom stated Jersey isn’t satisfied with her dude sexually.
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October 14th, 2010 at 12:52 am
Brooklyn
it’s Sweetest Day Week 
Spread/Spray alittle love on your heart 
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10/15/2010
Since she keeps it 100 with you, why cant she do that with her man? I agree with the other comments his sex must be wack. Everyone knows you dont replace good wood, unless its necessary
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2/7/2011
hmmm…
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